After reading an email from my sweet wife about what she is thankful for, I realized that my previous Thanksgiving post was incomplete. I failed to mention the things that I am thankful for.
I’m thankful for having such a wonderful family. Starting with my wife. She is so incredibly kind and loving. Her dedication & loyalty is absolutely impeccable. I am so blessed to have her. Thank you, Suzie!
I’m thankful for my amazing mother and all of her love & support. Thanks, mom! I love you.
I’m thankful for my sisters, and my nieces & nephew. I’m especially thankful for my brother-in-laws and how they treat my sisters and their kids.
Wow! There’s so much to be thankful for.
I’m thankful for my Friends.
I’m thankful for my readers and followers.
I’m thankful for being in The Dog Program.
I’m thankful for the opportunity to blog.
I’m thankful to be alive and to have a release date.
I’m thankful for my Marriage.
I’m thankful for clothes to wear and food to eat.
I’m thankful for JPay.
I’m thankful for football season.
I’m thankful for Influential Books to read.
I’m thankful for my health.
I’m thankful for Stone City Blog.
I’m thankful for the opportunity to take NA classes to earn back good time.
I’m thankful for all my blessings and for all the people who love & support me.
This event was much needed for my wife and I. We spent quality time loving each other face to face.
As she walked in, I stood up and waved my arms. She quickly identified me. Her face lit up as she got closer and closer. She looked so beautiful in the outfit I picked out for her.
Finally she reached my arms. I held her tight as I gave her a long hug.. I kissed all over her pretty face. I bit her cheeks…gently. I sniffed her hair. Then I smooched all over her soft lips. No French kiss…just some soft, slow, passionate, long over-due smooching. I’ll save all the French kisses for our EFV’s in nine months when I’m making sweet passionate love to her ALL NIGHT LONG!
After our intro, I pulled out her chair and we sat. I kissed her a few more times as I asked how her trip went. I spent some time telling her how much I love her and how thankful I am for her sweet love. Then I showed her the corsage I made. My wife absolutely loves flowers. After she smelled it, I pinned it just above one of her voluptuous double D’s.
She caught me looking at her milky mountains and said, “Whatchya looking at?”
I just looked up into her gorgeous green eyes, kissed her lips, and said, “Do you have any idea what I’m going to do with those things in nine months?”
She looked at me with her innocent eyes as she shook her head, “No.” Her adorableness was almost too much! With my pointer finger I directed her to come in close to me. I had a secret I wanted to tell her. As she leaned in, I gently gripped the back of her head and kissed from her lips, across her cheek, and to her ear. That’s when I completely dog tongued her entire ear as I penetrated her tight little ear hole.
She tried to pull away, but I’m too strong. I kept my wife right where I wanted her. Then I whispered, “I’m going to massage warm baby oil all over your huge fun bags before I…. (you’ll just have to read our erotic ebooks if you want all the details).
Despite two huge distractions smack dab in my face, I finally got that corsage pinned on. Then I asked her, “Have you ever played paddle ball with your chin?”
She looks at me with an unsure look and says, “No.”
In which I respond, “Don’t worry, baby. I’m going to teach you that game in nine months…you’ll love it!”
Anytime I mention “nine months” she knows I’m referring to our EFV’s (aka: conjugal visits), and all of a sudden my sexual innuendos make perfect sense to her.
Before we know it, lunch is being served and we’re making a toast to each other. We inner lock our arms and sip on some expensive bubbly Apple Cider. I can’t resist…I lean in and kiss my wife again. I thank her for marrying me and for all the love she brings to my world. Then as the afternoon faded into evening, we played along with the Newlywed Game and I read her my gratitude letter:
My Lovely Suzie,
I am so thankful for the sweet love and affection you bring to my life. You create wonderful sensations within my heart that otherwise would not exist. Your gift of love has truly changed my life. Thank you so much for all you do and all that you are. I recognize all the sacrifices you make for us. You are a great woman with a powerful and consistent love. Your dedication and commitment is so impressive. I admire you greatly. Mwah! I am so thankful for your sweet, gentle soul, and your caring ways. You are by far the best woman I know. With you as my beautiful wife, I am a better man. Let’s hug! I love you.
Despite the guard having to tell me three times to keep my hands off my wife, we had a perfect visit!
As it was time to say goodbye, Suzie asked me, “Do you want to be the last ones hugging?”
I took her in my arms and we out-hugged everyone in that room! Then I watched her walk out the door and up the walkway as we continued to blow kisses and maintain eye contact. Only when I couldn’t see her anymore, did I turn and leave the room.
I headed back to my unit the happiest man in this joint.
Thank you, Suzie…I LOVE YOU!
So much of my relationship with my wife is through letters and phone calls. The upcoming Significant Woman’s Event gives me the opportunity to be with my wife in person. It allows us the experience of what it would be like to eat in a resturant together. To dance with eachother. To play games together. And for me to express my gratitude towards her.
The quality time we spend together helps us bond as we learn eachother’s mannerisms. This also helps with our letter writing as it gives our written words a visual of personality. After every visit I feel our relationship strengthen. Suzie means the world to me and I could never thank her enough for all her dedication, commitment, and sacrifice.
This wonderful event allows me to show her how much I love and appreciate her. She truly is significant in my life. An absolute blessing! This is one day where I can demonstrate how special she really is to me. We can hug, kiss, hold hands, have eye contact, and experience what joy and happiness looks like on one another’s face in person.
Thank you to eveyone who helps Suzie and I unite in person for the event this weekend. We love you and appreciate all your support. To make a donation, please click HERE.
I am so proud of my darling wife. The work she does may at times feel thankless and uneventful, but she is doing incredible work helping the incarcerated.
I was brought to tears today. I was struggling with work and my own personal spiritual journey. I nearly wanted to give up. But I knew I’d be letting myself and my husband down.
I finally found the will to get online and dig into my list of things to do.
I manage Stone City Blog. It’s a collection of blogs written by men in prison. I don’t get paid for this. I’d call it charity/volunteer/non-profit work for right now.
I saw that I had about 60 emails from inmates, all waiting for me to post their work. I was expecting a large number like that. After all, I let things back up, knowing very well that I shouldn’t have let that happen.
About an hour into my work load, I find an email addressed to me.
As I opened it, tears streamed down my face as I began…
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The Significant Woman’s Event is on May 1st, 2016. Suzie and I absolutely love this event. It’s more like a date rather than a visit in prison.
This event is all about honoring the special woman in my life who has provided ongoing support, sacrifice, and encouragement: My loving wife, Suzie. The activities are designed to assist in fostering the growth & strengthening of our beautiful relationship.
I make and give her a corsage. We are served food and drinks just like in a restaurant. We get up and dance with each other. I take her to a private section where I read her a sweet, emotional, loving, gratitude letter.
You can read what this amazing event was like for us last year:
As you can see, this event is very special to us, and means a great deal to us both.
That’s why we’re humbly requesting some financial help so Suzie can make the trip from California to Washington for this event. Please help make this special day possible for us. Take a peek at our GoFundMe page.
With a positive powerful force behind me, I can do anything. My main objective in life is to be a good person. I want to love all people and inspire positive living. I want to show those who struggle that change is possible. I want to lead by example.
In addition to my wife, friends, and family, I have a strong support system.
The following are excerpts taken from hundreds of comments left by you…my loyal readers. This is what gives me the power to overcome the obstacles that come my way:
Wonderful post. Your honesty and openness is a great example for others.
I am moved beyond words! Huge smiles and blessings.
I’m so proud of your growth.
I admire your strength and courage to pursue this attitude…Much love and peace to you.
Keep up the wonderful things your doing.
I learn so much from you. You have been my sustaining strength in so many ways. I thank God for saving you from yourself.
I’m impressed with your spirit.
Well done! So impressed.
I love the way you write.
Thanks for the fun and interesting stories and keep them coming please.
Fun blog to read…informative as well.
I love this!
I thoroughly enjoyed this story, Don’t Shake Out Your Blankets From The Top Tier and I look forward to your next post.
Congrats on the Honor unit! Praying for you.
So happy for you-for making the Honor Unit, and for knowing how to be both wise and kind to the old man.
I look forward to reading more of your posts.
You are teaching me!
Your story and the change in your heart, mind, attitude, and actions concerning your family and others has truly been a blessing to my heart. Keep on keeping on this path, and may God bless you.
Love the tribute to your wife. Wonderful blogs. You are inspiring!
Your blog is so sophisticated.
I too love the journey you are on…That you could come from such darkness into the light is a story for everyone.
Take care and rest easy that God is pleased with your achievements and so am I.
You have something special. You are something special. (Stone City Blog)
Well done, you used mind power instead of physical power, big up bro.
Thank you. You are an inspiration to me. Just being able to watch as you change your life both internal and external is a privilege.
I dislike violence of any form but do not have a problem reading your stories.
Please continue to share all the steps along your journey. Your journey has been,and continues to be, remarkable, precisely because you came from such a dark painful place. You are a light for others and the light shines all the brighter in contrast to the black suffering that preceded it.
This was a brilliant post, a fine example of living and sadly dying by the sword. (The Law of Attraction)
The positive comments go on and on…..
And yes, there are negative comments too. But to me, it’s all good. Because negative comments remind me of the hostile spirit I once had. They show me a place where I never want to return. And if there is any shred of truth in them, they provide me with An Opportunity To Grow.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for all your prayers, encouragement, inspiration, and positive support. It makes a huge difference in my life and serves me very well.
A big heart-felt “Thank You” to everyone who takes the time to leave comments. Your positive encouragement is a powerful force in my life. In a sense, you all hold me accountable for my actions.
The last thing I want to do is let you all down by acting in a way that isn’t consistent with your support. I understand that first and foremost, I must conduct myself appropriately for no one but myself. But man, I gotta tell you…it’s such a blessing and inspiration to have my family, friends, and all you followers encouraging me.
I feel the power behind all the love & support. It fuels me and energizes me to deal with any situation in an appropriate manner.
The power you all give me has made it so easy to choose right over wrong. The choice isn’t even a decision anymore. It comes so easy and natural.
Whereas in the past, I would struggle to make the right decision. Then, after making the right decision, I would question it, and consider going back to reverse it.
Let me give an example…
One day (about 3 yrs ago) I was playing cards in the dayroom. There was four of us at the table. One guy was fairly new to the game. So I would give him pointers and tips.
He kept making the same mistake over and over. Pinochle can be complicated like that.
I got frustrated and lashed out, “Why the f**k are you making things so complicated? If you don’t know what to do, push trump! How many times do I gotta tell you?!”
To my surprise, this guy slammed his cards on the table, stood up, and said, “Talk to your f**king kids like that. I’m a grown man…you address me with respect.”
I said, “Calm down, your causing a scene.”
He said,” I don’t give a f**k! I’ll beat your ass!”
I said, “Dude! You’re tripping. It’s not that serious!”
At this point he realizes I’m not trying to fight. So he pushes a little harder. He acts like he’s throwing a punch across the table in an attempt to make me flinch. I didn’t.
He says, “Bring your ass to the bathroom” as he walks in that direction. The bathroom is where a lot of fights happen because it’s out of view from the cameras.
I say, “I’m not going to fight you…your tripping!”
This dialogue goes back and forth for too long. More and more people are starting to tune in. I’m on the verge of saying,”f*ck it” and going into the bathroom to beat his ass.
Instead I go to my cell for a self-imposed “time out”.
The mental re-enactment is pure torture! I want to go smash that dude so bad. I tell myself that I will go pay him a visit at a later date, when no one is looking, and no one is expecting it.
As the days turn into weeks, it gets easier to let it go. But every day I have to look at this guy, and everyday I’m reminded that he called me out and I ran to my cell like a little b*tch.
I never did go smash that guy. Instead, I realized my wrong doing. And I focused on how I brought that entire situation on myself.
Today, I would never allow a situation like that to even get started. Because today I have the power behind me that enables me to do the right thing. This power comes from within, and from all of you.
Whenever a potential bad situation comes my way, it’s so easy to deal with it appropriately. I am no longer tempted to lash out…not even a little bit.
This event was beyond awesome!!!
As the women walked into the visiting room, all the men were already in there (normally it’s the other way around). All the men stood up and clapped as our beautiful women entered the room.
As my wife approached me, we both had huge smiles on our faces. I hugged her tight and felt her soft warm body against mine.
Then I went in for a kiss. As our lips were about to touch, I pulled back and just looked at my lovely lady. Her lips were puckered up and her eyes closed. A split second later, when she realized we weren’t kissing, she opened her eyes only to find me inches from her face, looking at her.
This made us both laugh a little.
Then I went in for a smooch. She closed her eyes and puckered up. Again, I pulled back.
She opened her eyes and said, “Baby!”
I said, “Okay, come on, for real this time.”
She closed her eyes and puckered up. I couldn’t resist…I pulled back and left her hanging once again.
By now we’re both laughing pretty good. That’s when I smother her face with dozens of short, quick, kisses all over. I’m kissing her eyes, her nose, her cheeks, her forehead, her lips…I’m all over her pretty little face.
She’s laughing as she moves her face side to side in a futile effort to get away. My theatrics are in over-drive as I continue to kiss her with a full complement of sound effects…”MWAH MWAH MWAH MWAH MWAH…..”
Finally the madness stops, and we hug as our laughing subsides. Then I give her a soft slow sensual kiss on the lips. We smooch for a few seconds before I pull out her chair and help her sit down.
I show her the two corsages that I made for her. She decides she wants to wear the pink one. So I spend the next five minutes trying to figure out how to pin this thing on her without poking her.
We held hands and talked for a while. Then, the first of our three course meal is served.
The servers are inmates who act as professional servers. They are all wearing aprons. Some are even wearing chef hats.
We are served a salad, a pull-apart roll, cranberry juice, and water. Fifteen minutes later the main course arrives. It’s a chicken breast with a raspberry sauce, cooked asparagus, and red potatoes. This isn’t prison food! This is real quality well prepared food!
My wife realizes I rarely get to eat this good. So in addition to my meal, she feeds me several bites from her plate too. Awww, what a sweetheart. My baby is always looking out for me.
After the main course, dessert is served. It’s a moist chocolate brownie topped with ice cream, cool whip, and chocolate syrup. Mmmmm…that was the bomb-diggity! And of course my considerate, caring, loving, wife fed me bites from her plate too.
After lunch it was time to read the “gratitude letter” I wrote to her. So we walked to the booths that were specifically set up for this occasion. As we enjoyed an additional level of privacy, I read her the letter I wrote. It was a nice moment we shared.
Then came the time to dance. I waited for the music to start, then I stood up, extended my hand and asked, “May I have this dance?”
She said, “Yes.”
We danced through both songs.
After arriving back at our table, the event coordinator made an announcement. She said, “I need five couples to volunteer for the Newlywed Game.”
We raised our hands and got selected.
The women were escorted out of the visiting room while the men were asked four questions.
The first question: “What is your anniversary date, and her birthday?”
That one was easy…everyone got it right.
The second question: “What puts your wife in a good mood?”
I said, “Romantic love letters.”
She said, “Love letters & emails.”
The visiting room applauded our successful answer.
The third question: “What is your wife thinking right now?”
I said, “I love you.”
She said, “I love you baby.”
I heard a few “Awww’s” as the audience clapped.
The fourth question: “Who said ‘I love you’ first?”
I said, “I did.”
She said, “He did.”
All the men said, “I love you” first.
Everyone got that one right.
We answered all four questions correctly. Then it was time for the men to leave as the women answered four questions.
The first question: “What would your husband rather loose, his hair or his JP4 player?
She said, “His JP4 player.”
I said, “My hair.”
The audience laughed.
I can blog without hair! I need my JP4!
Second question: “What’s your husband’s favorite thing to do in here?”
She said, “Workout.”
I said, “Watch football.”
The third question: “When was the last time you two got in a fight?”
We both said the exact same thing, “NEVER”.
Suzie and I don’t fight. We may disagree at times, but we never fight.
The fourth question: “What’s the first thing he’s going to do when he gets out?”
She said, “Spend time with family.”
I said the exact same thing.
There were no prizes, except for the beautiful women by our sides. Everyone was laughing and having fun, and that made everyone a winner.
Suzie and I spent the next few hours loving each other and enjoying one another’s company. I am so blessed to have her as my wife. She has brought so many wonderful joys into my world.
Today was very special for the both of us. And I was able to tell her just how significant she is to me.
Suzie has brought love into my life. And she has sacrificed so much. I see her kind heart and I feel her loving soul.
The way she loves me…I’ve never felt such a love before. I wasn’t sure if I’d find a woman to love me, a man in prison with 18+ years left to serve. I am so thankful to have her by my side. She is serving this time with me as my partner and my best friend.
Every day, I recognize a certain strength in her. And I am constantly realizing just how much we have in common.
Thank you baby, for blessing my life with your incredible love, compassion, and devotion. I love you sooo much with all my heart!!!
(To read Suzie’s perspective of this event, to see an additional picture, and to read the gratitude letter I wrote…please read her blog called, A Special Day Together.)
This event is all about honoring the special woman in my life who has provided ongoing support, sacrifice, and encouragement: My loving wife, Suzie.
The activities are designed to assist in fostering the growth & strengthening of our relationship. In order to attend this event, I had to complete three workshops.
1) The first workshop covered “Gratitude Letters”.
Dawn Taylor (the event coordinator) gave us a lecture as to what a gratitude letter really is. Or should I say, what it is NOT. It is not a love letter, or a sex letter, or even a thank you letter.
It is a letter that expresses gratitude & recognizes sacrifices. After Ms. Taylor made her points perfectly clear, she then gave everyone some pretty stationary. I chose butterflies and roses on mine. Then I wrote my gratitude letter to my awesome wife.
2) The second workshop taught us how to do the “Waltz”.
It’s a non-contact square dance. We can hold hands while doing it…but no body-to-body, bumping and grinding type stuff.
Yep, they’re going to allow us to dance with our wives. Pretty cool if you ask me!!! This is a special moment that we will share together. I have butterflies in my stomach just thinking of it.
3) At the third and finale workshop, we made corsages for the women we love.
This event is amazing! I’m so impressed with all the effort that goes into it. It’s almost like a High School prom or something like that.
Suzie will be making the 14 hour drive from California to Washington. She’ll be leaving CA at 3 am and driving non-stop all the way to me.
I love you baby….thank you so much! I’m so excited to see my wife.
I’ll be sure to write all about it and share pics.
Right now I am writing this blog from the HONOR UNIT!!!
The laws of the Universe are ones that cannot error.
Once I realized self-consciousness, I then gradually discovered one law after another. As I discovered these laws, I wasted no time setting them in motion. I am on a never-ending journey to conquer my environment through my knowledge of the Universal Laws.
I can’t believe I’m actually in the HONOR UNIT right now. Actually….yes I can believe it.
All I had to do is embody the truth and constructively use the law.
I can’t tell you how good it feels to live free from bondage. I have never been happier. My life is so good right now. And don’t forget…..I’M IN PRISON!
But the Laws of The Universe doesn’t know I’m in prison. These laws are automatic. The powers within can be used for good or bad. That choice is up to me. My thoughts, acting through Law, can and have changed my living conditions.
The FREEDOM I feel from within prison is unbelievable. Yesterday I cried tears of joy. Then I got sad. Sad because it took such a devastating blow in order for me to reach this level of serenity.
Right now I am in a cell with a 70 year old man. He is an old war vet. He shot his gun in the air to scare off a few teenagers who were trespassing on his property. The cops were called. He shot a few more rounds in the air. That poor choice cost him 13 years.
He might die in here. If you let him tell it, he will die in here.
In my 21 years of prison, I have never seen such depression. This man just lays in bed and hopes for death.
He has gone through 25 cellies in 2 years. I haven’t even had that many…and I’ve been down for 21 years. No one wants to live with him. And now I see why.
As soon as I walked in, I had to walk out. The cell stunk that bad.
I went and talked to the Sgt. to see if I could get a different cell. None were available. I had no choice but to move into this FILTHY cell.
The floor was like walking on sand. The walls were dripping with dried up gunk. Dust and grime was everywhere. And this is my new home….in the honor unit!
I immediately had to control my compulsive thoughts. Stress wanted to enter. Disappointment wanted to enter. I realized the power of NOW…and had to make a choice. Do I want to use the POWER of LAW consciously or unconsciously? Do I want the LAW to work constructively or destructively? The choice was simple.
I took a deep breath and entered the cell. The old man immediately sat up in his bunk.
I said, “Hello, my name is Steven. I’m your new celly.”
I extended my hand. His frail hand shook it. I noticed the sores all up his arm. He said in a shaky voice, “I’m Charlie.”
“Nice to meet you, sir” I said with a smile.
“There’s nothing nice about this place” he responded.
“Yeah, I hear that! Especially when you have to spend 43 years here.”
His eyes lit up. “Mercy!” he says. “How many people did you kill?”
“None!” I said. “They gave me 43 years for 4 counts of Assault. That was 21 years ago.”
I told him all this to give him some perspective. To show him he’s not the only one with reason to be depressed. To let him know that I’m carrying some weight too. Now maybe my words will have more of an impact on him.
I made up my mind that I was going to subjectify positive thoughts and set Universal Laws in motion.
For an hour straight I talked to old Charlie. I let him do most of the talking. He told me he used to live on a sailboat. I told him my dad lived on a sailboat and I showed him pictures.
I treated this man with compassion and respect. As a result, he opened up to me. I even made him smile a few times. Meanwhile, all my stuff is outside the door. But I NEED to clean before I bring it in.
So I ask old Charlie, “Do you mind if I clean the cell before I bring in all my property?”
“Sure….go ahead” he said in his old voice.
Right away I realize this is a breakthrough. Because a few guys gave me a heads up before I even entered Charlie’s cell. They said he’s old, grumpy, negative, doesn’t shower, doesn’t clean, and gets upset when his celly tries to clean.
When I realized what I was up against, I thought, “No wonder they sent me to the honor unit. They knew where I was going. It all makes sense now. They’re testing me.” (I could be wrong, but the thought did cross my mind)
For the next hour, I thoroughly scrubbed and disinfected the entire cell. Charlie just layed there and watched me. I continued to make small talk and crack jokes.
I’d ask, “Are you ok? Am I bothering you? How ya feeling?” And every time he said he was doing fine. So I kept scrubbing!
The next day I talked to the Sgt. He asked me about Charlie and how it was going. He was shocked at my answer. He said he had NEVER seen Charlie smile. I said, “Oh, yeah, well I’ve heard him laugh.”
The Sgt. called me a miracle worker, expressed much gratitude, thanked me several times and shook my hand. I walked outta his office feeling better in that moment than I could ever feel had they put me in a clean cell with a rich, easy-going youngster.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m still looking to move as soon as a bunk opens up. But while I’m in here, I’ll continue to use the power of law for all things good. It feels great knowing that I can change my conditions by changing the way I think. And I can apply this to every aspect of life.
So guess what’s next? Yup…The Dog Program! I will get there. Never underestimate the power of being persistent.
Have a nice day.