Tagged: wife

Taking The Edge Off Prison Life

 

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The following poem was written back in June of 1996. Back then I was a drug using, drug selling, violent little badass. I was at Walla Walla, living with Mikey and Jeff. When we were using drugs and smoking joints people use to walk by our cell, look in, and fiend. A lot of guys would stop at our bars and try to make small talk in hopes it would lead to a free hit, or a joint.

(To read more about this crazy time in my life, please check out my ebook called, STONE CITY: LIFE IN THE PENITENTIARY. Specifically, Chapter: 7.)

 

TAKING THE EDGE OFF PRISON LIFE

Waking up slow to the practical jokes,
where coffee is a must and everyone smokes.

Take a deep breath you can smell the green,
as the broke walk by they look in and fiend.

People say I’m gone how I wish that was true,
the fact is that I’m here so let me tell you what I do.

I kick em in the face sometimes I choke em out,
But then I get away with it and that’s what its about.

So please don’t mess because I gotta confess,
when it comes to fighting dirty I’m one of the best.

So what if I’m small so what if you’re tall,
within ten seconds guarantee you will fall.

The hell with taking the edge off prison life,
its more like taking your head off with my prison knife!

 

That poem illustrates just how sick my thoughts were. As a result, my actions were extremely destructive. I was oblivious to the fact that I induced my own suffering and hardships.

Now, it is with a joyous heart that I share a more recent poem that was written on 10-25-13, in the midst of enlightenment and spiritual awakening. I am so blessed to have this gentle love in my life. THIS is what takes the edge off of prison life for me these days.

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THE MAGIC OF HER LOVE

Love is like magic, at least it is for me.
I pulled a rabbit out the hat, and her name is Suzie.

She transformed my world, a cold hard place.
By showing me a warm soft glow, within the beauty of her face.

Our situation is unique, and to some very strange.
But there’s nothing in this world that love can’t change.

Her love is so pure, understanding and kind.
She loves with all her heart, body, soul and mind.

Her love is so powerful, it reaches my core.
Her love is a love I’ve never felt before.

Her love is a love in which I’ve been seeking.
Her love is a language in which I’m now speaking.

Her love is the love that inspires my life.
Her love is the love that I’ve found in my wife.

 

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Steven Jennings

Thanksgiving In The Joint (part 2)

 

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After reading an email from my sweet wife about what she is thankful for, I realized that my previous Thanksgiving post was incomplete. I failed to mention the things that I am thankful for.

I’m thankful for having such a wonderful family. Starting with my wife. She is so incredibly kind and loving. Her dedication & loyalty is absolutely impeccable. I am so blessed to have her. Thank you, Suzie!

I’m thankful for my amazing mother and all of her love & support. Thanks, mom! I love you.

I’m thankful for my sisters, and my nieces & nephew. I’m especially thankful for my brother-in-laws and how they treat my sisters and their kids.

Wow! There’s so much to be thankful for.

I’m thankful for my Friends.
I’m thankful for my readers and followers.
I’m thankful for being in The Dog Program.
I’m thankful for the opportunity to blog.
I’m thankful to be alive and to have a release date.
I’m thankful for my Marriage.
I’m thankful for clothes to wear and food to eat.
I’m thankful for JPay.
I’m thankful for football season.
I’m thankful for Influential Books to read.
I’m thankful for my health.
I’m thankful for Stone City Blog.
I’m thankful for the opportunity to take NA classes to earn back good time.
I’m thankful for all my blessings and for all the people who love & support me.

Thank you.

 

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Steven Jennings

 

Thanksgiving In The Joint (part 1)

Stone Catchers: I Quit!!!

 

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My wife recently asked how my book group, Stone Catchers, was going. I told her that I quit because of a few guys that I despise.

 

She sweetly reminded me of what I wrote in a post called, STONE CATCHERS (WEEK 1):

“Within this class you can catch those potentially destructive stones and lay them to rest in your beautiful stone garden that represents peace, love, and harmony. The more stones you catch, the less they hurt.”

 

She also wrote:

“I’m sorry to hear that a few guys have been making it unpleasant. Steven Baby, you are the strongest, smartest, and the most understanding man I know. What matters in this class is your growth and the positive change happening within you. I love you and I recognize your powerful mental strength and self-control. You are amazing!”

 

In which I replied:

“Thank you for the encouragement to stick with Stone Catchers. I will. I need to learn to cope with a variety of different personalities. And this is a perfect opportunity to hone those skills. Mwah…you are a great source of inspiration for me. Thank you, honey.”

 

So I went back and joined the group. And now we’re reading a book called, “The Alchemist” by Paulo Coelho.

The reviews are so phenomenal that they led me to believe I was about to read the greatest book in the history of the world. But by page 20, I was ready to do what I’ve done in the past. And that is to chuck the book against the wall, then roll over and go to sleep. So far this book is stupid and scattered. But like the literacy group itself, I’m going to continue on, and try my best to get something positive out of it. However, I’m struggling right now.

By staying in the group, it’ll help me with my coping skills as I endure child molester Ray Ray run his mouth. Every time he opens his mouth, I just want to get up and walk out. Which I did at the last meeting. And I hadn’t been back since.

And if Ray Ray isn’t enough, I also have to sit there and listen to Dicky Oppen, a compulsive liar and master manipulator of the system. (Living With A Compulsive Liar…Is It Bad Or Good?)

By now, it’s clear how I feel. So what do I do? I feel like calling them out and exposing their bad intentions and devious ways. But who am I to do that? Another option I have is to remove myself from the equation. Quit the group. And just keep to myself. And for a moment, that’s what I did.

As I sit, think, and meditate on it, I come to the conclusion that I need these type of encounters/situations in order for me to grow and evolve. I need to face these type of inner conflicts as I challenge myself to remain positive and conduct myself appropriately.

Not because they deserve it, but because I deserve the inner positivity and peace that appropriate action attracts. And just because I don’t say anything to them, doesn’t mean I don’t harbor negative thoughts and feelings towards them. Because I do. And that’s wrong. I need to fix that.

Thoughts are things. The law of attraction operates through thoughts just the same as it does through actions. Therefore if I even as so much think in a negative manner, I’m essentially attracting negativity to myself. And it’s only a matter of time before negative thoughts will manifest into negative actions.

So now, at the age of 43, it’s time I recognize and really watch how my mind thinks. It’s time I utilize a deeper level of consciousness and truly control my mind and thoughts. It can be done. As I write this, my mind is already gearing up for my next course of action. And I feel like it won’t be as hard for me as I initially thought it would be.

Maybe I’ll say something nice to those two guys. As it is now, I don’t even talk to either one. I just sit back and think negatively towards them. And they have no idea. It’s all me. It’s all in my head. It’s my problem.

Well not anymore. I’ll find a way to overcome as I strive to live in peace with all of mankind.

As for the stupid book…ut…I mean, awesome book. I’ll talk more about that in another post.

Thank you for making this platform what it is. You and this blog have helped me tremendously. Thank you for all the inspiring comments. Keep em coming.

And a special THANK YOU to my amazing wife, Suzie. Your love, support, and encouragement have made me a better man. I love you, honor you, and appreciate you with all my heart.

 

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Steven Jennings

 

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STONE CATCHERS: The Alchemist (part 1)
STONE CATCHERS: The Alchemist (part 2)
STONE CATCHERS: The Alchemist (part 3)

True Love Never Gives Up

 

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Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 Corinthians 13:7

 

Every marriage faces choppy waters. Divorce is at an all time high. Just the other day I heard a guy in here talking about how he’s about to “fire his wife!” He’s tripping on her because she’s slow-walking his food package.

UNBELIEVABLE!!!

Actually, no it’s not. So many men in here play games with love and emotions. They are not sincere with their love. They are users and abusers. They continue to use until the money dries up, or till they get released. These type of relationships are scattered throughout prison visiting rooms all across America. It breaks my heart and it’s sad to see.

I sincerely love my wife with all my heart. All I wanna do is love this woman and make her happy. No drama, no stress, no arguing, no fighting.

Wouldn’t that be sweet?
Oh, it is!!!

Suzie and I enjoy a strong circle of harmony. But every now and then, we find ourselves in choppy waters. In those times, it is my duty as a husband, to take positive steps that will change the emotional climate and calm the choppy waters.

Smooth sailing in the sea of love is always possible when true love guides the heart.

I’m not perfect, and I still have a lot to learn. But one thing I know for sure is that I love my wife with all my heart and I will forever cherish her and the sweet love she gives me. My #1 priority in our marriage is to treat Suzie with nothing but love, understanding, compassion, and respect.

Our mantra: LOVE CONQUERS ALL!

There’s so much I can’t give this magnificent woman…at least not right now. But what I can give her, is the unconditional love she desires and longs for. I can always give her my very best! When it comes to our marriage and our love, I will always put forth effort, as I maintain faith and hope that our love will only grow stronger throughout our journey.

I love you my sweet Suzie. Thank you for blessing my life with your precious love.

 

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Steven Jennings

 

 

A Prayer For My Wife As She Hikes The PCT

 

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Dear Heavenly Father,

As my wife hikes the Pacific Crest Trail (PCT), I pray that she endures throughout the day and night. Please let it be known unto her heart how much I love and appreciate her, and how thankful I am to have her. Anoint her with all the energy she needs to make it through each and every day. Help keep her strong, sharp, and focused. I pray she feels good physically and will have the mental fortitude to appropriately process any situation she encounters.

Bless my wife by giving her sound intuition as she navigates through the wilderness. Lead her to a place of solitude where she may rejuvenate and revive her beautiful soul. Pour out Your peace and love all over her. Please let her see just how much she contributes to our happiness and quality of life together. Reinforce in her heart and mind how valuable she is. Equip her to seek, find, and carry out her purpose in this world.

Please Lord Jesus, be with Suzie on her journey and let her know that she is loved & supported.

Amen!

 

~ Steven Jennings

 

❤   Hiking 1,000 Miles To Hug My Husband  ❤

Love Language: Getting To Know Each Other

 

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7/3/16

Hello My Love,

I love you. You are an amazing woman in so many ways. You are by far my most valued treasure. I am blessed to have you in my life as my wife. You teach me so much about myself and what it takes to live in harmony with another person.

I love our communication skills and how we share our feelings with each other. The deeper we dive into one another, the more we learn. This learning curve inevitably exposes our differences, weaknesses, personal issues, and character flaws. We have proven to each other that love and communication conquers all. Thank you for loving me through all my defects and flaws. Thank you for opening up to me and trusting me with your heart.

Our marriage will last forever and thrive, because we truly communicate. We accept what IS as we constantly work to resolve issues and create acceptable remedies for each other. It feels so good to have this level of mental intimacy with you. And soon we will be physically intimate as well!

I love you!

Your Husband,
Steven Jennings

 

( To read more of our letters, please visit our blog: Real Love Letters )

 

The 2016 Significant Woman’s Event

 

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This event was much needed for my wife and I. We spent quality time loving each other face to face.

As she walked in, I stood up and waved my arms. She quickly identified me. Her face lit up as she got closer and closer. She looked so beautiful in the outfit I picked out for her.

Finally she reached my arms. I held her tight as I gave her a long hug.. I kissed all over her pretty face. I bit her cheeks…gently. I sniffed her hair. Then I smooched all over her soft lips. No French kiss…just some soft, slow, passionate, long over-due smooching. I’ll save all the French kisses for our EFV’s in nine months when I’m making sweet passionate love to her ALL NIGHT LONG!

After our intro, I pulled out her chair and we sat. I kissed her a few more times as I asked how her trip went. I spent some time telling her how much I love her and how thankful I am for her sweet love. Then I showed her the corsage I made. My wife absolutely loves flowers. After she smelled it, I pinned it just above one of her voluptuous double D’s.

She caught me looking at her milky mountains and said, “Whatchya looking at?”

I just looked up into her gorgeous green eyes, kissed her lips, and said, “Do you have any idea what I’m going to do with those things in nine months?”

She looked at me with her innocent eyes as she shook her head, “No.” Her adorableness was almost too much! With my pointer finger I directed her to come in close to me. I had a secret I wanted to tell her. As she leaned in, I gently gripped the back of her head and kissed from her lips, across her cheek, and to her ear. That’s when I completely dog tongued her entire ear as I penetrated her tight little ear hole.

She tried to pull away, but I’m too strong. I kept my wife right where I wanted her. Then I whispered, “I’m going to massage warm baby oil all over your huge fun bags before I…. (you’ll just have to read our erotic ebooks if you want all the details).

Despite two huge distractions smack dab in my face, I finally got that corsage pinned on. Then I asked her, “Have you ever played paddle ball with your chin?”

She looks at me with an unsure look and says, “No.”

In which I respond, “Don’t worry, baby. I’m going to teach you that game in nine months…you’ll love it!”

Anytime I mention “nine months” she knows I’m referring to our EFV’s (aka: conjugal visits), and all of a sudden my sexual innuendos make perfect sense to her.

Before we know it, lunch is being served and we’re making a toast to each other. We inner lock our arms and sip on some expensive bubbly Apple Cider. I can’t resist…I lean in and kiss my wife again. I thank her for marrying me and for all the love she brings to my world. Then as the afternoon faded into evening, we played along with the Newlywed Game and I read her my gratitude letter:

 

My Lovely Suzie,

I am so thankful for the sweet love and affection you bring to my life. You create wonderful sensations within my heart that otherwise would not exist. Your gift of love has truly changed my life. Thank you so much for all you do and all that you are. I recognize all the sacrifices you make for us. You are a great woman with a powerful and consistent love. Your dedication and commitment is so impressive. I admire you greatly. Mwah! I am so thankful for your sweet, gentle soul, and your caring ways. You are by far the best woman I know. With you as my beautiful wife, I am a better man. Let’s hug! I love you.

Your Husband,
Steven

 

Despite the guard having to tell me three times to keep my hands off my wife, we had a perfect visit!

As it was time to say goodbye, Suzie asked me, “Do you want to be the last ones hugging?”

I took her in my arms and we out-hugged everyone in that room! Then I watched her walk out the door and up the walkway as we continued to blow kisses and maintain eye contact. Only when I couldn’t see her anymore, did I turn and leave the room.

I headed back to my unit the happiest man in this joint.

Thank you, Suzie…I LOVE YOU!

 

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Steven Jennings

Take The Initiative To Express Love

 

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What’s better than love? NOTHING…that’s what! So why not take the initiative to express love? Everyday. To your spouse. Your children. Your friends. To mankind.

I’m shocked by all the men who take their women for granted. No wonder divorce rates are at an all time high. I understand that every couple will have their differences. It happens. I’m going through it with my wife, Suzie, right now.

It would be so easy to lose my composure and say something stupid. But what good would that do? I love this woman. Therefore, it’s my duty to soothe and comfort as we work through our conflict in a respectful, loving manner.

How do I do that? By drawing on the knowledge I learned from a book by Don Miguel Ruiz called, The Four Agreements. The first agreement is: BE IMPECCABLE WITH MY WORDS. This means, speak kindly to the woman I love. Always. No matter what. Under no circumstances is it okay for me to allow my emotions to dictate a tone of voice that operates outside the realms of love.

I must admit, in the past, I have been guilty of that. I recognized it. I didn’t like it. I fixed it! And it wasn’t really all that difficult to fix. Especially when you consider the beneficiary…my wife, the woman I love, my marriage.

If I have something to say, and it involves negative feelings, I find a way to say it as nicely as possible. Because I love Suzie, and I am committed to giving her my best at all times. She is such a sweet sensitive soul and she deserves so much more than I can give.

The least I can do is love her with all my mind, body, and soul…with all my power and strength focused on loving her the way God intended for a man to love his wife.

The way I simply talk to my wife makes all the difference in the world. Words are powerful! So why not use them in the direction of truth and love? If you are in conflict with someone you love, take the initiative to express love.

 

A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flair. Proverbs 15:1

 

Please Keep Us In Your Prayers

 

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Steven Jennings

Hiking 1,000 Miles To Hug My Husband

 

My amazing wife is coming to give me a hug!

Suzie M. Jennings

How to Choose the Best Hiking Boots for You

Yep, I am!

Our marriage is full of Paper Hugs, and I really feel like going the distance to get a real one. I will start in California and hike north on the Pacific Crest Trail all the way up to Washington, where my husband is. I estimate that this long distance backpacking trip will take nearly 3 months.

This hike symbolizes my commitment and devotion. There will be peaks and valleys along the way on this trip, just as in our life together. Most of our communication is virtual right now (emails, blogging, social media, etc.). I just feel like I need to do something physical to make this marriage feel more real to me.

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The romantic in me is doing this for my marriage. But I am also doing it for myself. To heal. To accept. To experience. To find my truth. To feel alive. And to feel a sense of personal…

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What The Significant Woman’s Event Means To Me

 

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So much of my relationship with my wife is through letters and phone calls. The upcoming Significant Woman’s Event gives me the opportunity to be with my wife in person. It allows us the experience of what it would be like to eat in a resturant together. To dance with eachother. To play games together. And for me to express my gratitude towards her.

The quality time we spend together helps us bond as we learn eachother’s mannerisms. This also helps with our letter writing as it gives our written words a visual of personality. After every visit I feel our relationship strengthen. Suzie means the world to me and I could never thank her enough for all her dedication, commitment, and sacrifice.

This wonderful event allows me to show her how much I love and appreciate her. She truly is significant in my life. An absolute blessing! This is one day where I can demonstrate how special she really is to me. We can hug, kiss, hold hands, have eye contact, and experience what joy and happiness looks like on one another’s face in person.

Thank you to eveyone who helps Suzie and I unite in person for the event this weekend. We love you and appreciate all your support. To make a donation, please click HERE.

Thank you.

 

I Love You...baby

 

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Steven Jennings